~Happy Pills~

So I went to see my psychiatrist yesterday. My husband had to go with me. My anxiety has gotten so bad, I am unable to go anywhere alone, without feeling anxious. I immediately start getting short of breath, my hands and face get all sweaty, I start shaking and then I’m convinced everyone knows something’s wrong with me. I feel everyone looking at me. Sometimes I even hear them laughing. It’s pretty bad. I know.
I did not want to see the doctor. I hate having to be on medication. I hate talking about my feelings or how I’m doing. I hate not being normal. Why is everything so damn difficult for me? Why do I have to take 5 prescriptions just to feel ok?
I am so glad my husband was there. He makes me follow through and actually talked to the doctor about whats really going on with me. Which made it impossible for me to come up with any stories to get out of whatever he wanted to prescribe. He made sure i got the meds i needed, and held my hand the whole time. I couldn’t do it alone. I was trying so hard to get out of going but since my husband was going, I had to go. You cant fake a flat tire if someones with you. lol.
For all the curious readers the almighty psychiatrist has prescribed the following meds: Wellbutrin 200 mg 1 tab twice a day, Celexa 10mg 1 tab once a day, both of those for depression. I am also on Trileptal 300mg 3 tabs at bedtime for a mood stabilizer and busbar 15mg 1 tab twice a day and Ativan 1 mg 1 tab up to 3 times a day as needed. Both of those for anxiety. I am being compliant this time. I am taking my meds.
According to the almighty psychiatrist himself,  I should start feeling pretty good in a few weeks. For the meantime, I’m depressed, and I am pissed.

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8 Comments

  1. Feeling better lol. The Rant and Rave was amazing. I got a lot of helpful feed back. Thank you.

  2. Thanks for the support. I appreciate the share.

  3. Thanks for checking me out lol. I am following you too. Its nice to have a little insight on what my friends and family might be going through. Sometimes I forget just how much this illness affects everyone, and not just the person with the diagnosis.

  4. Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. I would strongly encourage you to blog more you might surprise yourself. I did. I didn't think I could do it.

  5. Hi, I am stopping by from the Newbie Blog Hop. I saw your link and couldn't wait to read your blog. I have both family experience and personal experience with mental health issues. I have OCD, depression and anxiety. I have been at some very low points during my life. I have not blogged about it very often, but I hope to do more. I usually just blog about my life with my family and children now, but I love how open and real your blog is. It is wonderful that your husband is so supportive of you. Jessicahttp://www.arebutterfliesticklish.com/

  6. Hi…I found you on Blogaholic and couldn't wait to check it out, I am now your latest follower & love this….I write from the other end, I have a son who is Bipolar and the struggles we have as a family because of this…please visit me @ http://wts2011.blogspot.com/ and follow along…..I will be visiting you often, as I can really learn from you to help him!Jo

  7. Hi! I am honored to be your third follower. I look forward to following you and reading your stories. I would love it if you visited and followed my blog. I have a few giveaways going on. Hope to see you there. I am also sharing your blog on My Life.'s face book page. Donnahttp://mylife-in-stories.blogspot.com

  8. WOW…very RAW blog!! Hope you start feeling better!!!I am your newest follower and would LOVE for you stop by and follow me!! I even have a party going called "RANT AND RAVE About My Blog" where feollow bloggers critique your blog and tell you hwo to improve it…anonymously!!http://www.randeesorganizedchaos.com/2012/01/rant-and-rave-about-my-blog_16.htmlI am also having a linky party for this week that I have every Sunday if you want to link up your blog to get exposurehttp://www.randeesorganizedchaos.com/2012/01/rant-and-rave-about-my-blog_16.html


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